The Firemen of Oz
by Esmarias
Summary: The guys recount a bunch of crazy calls to a clueless Officer Vince. Inspired by tired craziness coming home from a late night play.


___A/N: "In the jungle, the mighty jungle, the lion sleeps tonight. In the jungle, the mighty jungle, the lion sleeps tonight..." Well good for the lion. I bet he never had to try sleeping in an unfamiliar jungle. So guess what me and my family did? Yeah; we moved. Yesterday. No... sorry, it was the day BEFORE yesterday. And we're still moving stuff from the old house to the new house. And if that isn't bad enough, it's hot here in America's Trusty Mitt. Not my kind of weather. So apologies for this author's present inactivity._

_My family and I were driving back from watching The Wizard of Oz play [like, three months ago maybe?] and they dared me to write this. I didn't come up with all the 'rescues'. That was a team effort – well, actually, it was my mom, dad, brother and sister throwing suggestions at me from every which way, and me contributing and writing them all down for later usage. Hope you enjoy!_

**The Firemen of Oz**

John Gage sat on the bumper of the squad, watching and waiting as his sore hand was tended to. The line of nasty teeth marks embedded into his palm were cut out of view as the white gauze was pulled over it then wrapped around again and again. His paramedic partner finally snipped the gauze with his scissors and tucked in the end.

"It'll probably need stitches," Roy commented as he put away the gauze and the antibiotic with which he had used to clean his partner's deep bite. Johnny merely nodded in reply.

"Hey, guys," Ron Evans from Animal Control greeted them.

"Hey," Gage and DeSoto answered.

"Where's Gordon?" Johnny wondered, looking around for him.

"Sick leave – caught a case of strep throat, or so I hear."

"That's gotta kill," Roy stated.

Ron nodded. "Les has been getting under my skin all morning. He, the senior ranking officer, is the one with all that nervous energy, worrying about his poor, defenseless partner and all. I swear, it's as if he doesn't think the kid can take care of himself. What a mother hen."

"Auntie Les! Auntie Les!" Kelly called from a distance. Ron laughed. "Yeah, that's about right! I wonder how Dave puts up with it?"

Gage cast a small, secret glance to his own partner before returning his gaze to the man before him. "Well. Other than Taylor, how's _your_ day been so far?" He couldn't help asking.

"Wow, man – we've been getting some pretty crazy calls!"

"You too?"

"Yeah. Seems to be going around the district. Me and Dave bumped into Reed and Malloy a while back, and they said that they had to apprehend a woman who was trying to steal her neighbor's shoes to give to her daughter to wear to a party."

"Were they red?" Roy asked.

The man nodded. "Yep; and the daughter was wearing a blue dress. Oh, and the woman that the mother was trying to steal from had just stepped out of this salon and had this green goop all over her face. Weird, huh? Then earlier this crazy old bat called our number, raving hysterically about flying monkeys!"

All 51's guys within earshot groaned at that last statement.

"Can you believe this?" Gage asked a minute later, after Ron had left.

Roy shook his head. "It is something, isn't it?"

"Do you think maybe dispatch has been conspiring behind everyone's backs?"

"I doubt it."

"Was there a full moon last night?"

"You know I don't believe in that kind of superstitious nonsense, but no, not that I know of."

"Then how would you explain it?"

"I wouldn't." Roy snapped the lid to the trauma box shut and stood up again. "I just grin and bear it – and occasionally laugh."

"Oh really?" Gage held up his wrapped hand. "Did you laugh about this?"

"Not when it happened, of course not. I only laughed when Evans and Les subdued the thing and we were able read its' name tag."

"I hope it didn't have rabies or somethin'," Johnny muttered.

"Oh, come on, Johnny, it had its' shots. The owners even have the paperwork from the vet. They even said its' always had a bit of an aggressive nature since they adopted it from the shelter. Don't be so paranoid." Roy shoved the trauma box into it's place in the squad compartment and shut the door.

Johnny jumped up and started waving his hands around. "Paranoid? Paranoid! After all that's happened this shift, that's happened to all of us, you're the one telling ME **not** to be paranoid? Roy I-" Johnny stopped mid-rant and grabbed his wrapped hand, wincing.

"Careful with that hand," Roy reminded him.

"Yeah. Got it."

Just then, Officer Vince Howard arrived in his black and white. Pulling up to the scene, he got out and walked up to the two paramedics. He took one look at Gage sitting back down on the bumper and was instantly puzzled.

"Hey," he called to them as he got close.

"Hey, Vince," Roy replied. "How's life?" [*_1_]

"Okay, I guess, but not my favorite. I was a little apprehensive when I first tried it, but my wife thought it'd be good for me, so I took a risk. If I'm in the right mood, I actually like it. But mostly, I just prefer oatmeal in the morning. How 'bout you?"

"You know what I mean, but if you're cheerful enough to make jokes, I guess it can't be that bad. Me? I don't know about me yet, or at least this past weekend I don't."

"What makes this weekend any different?"

"Vince, you wouldn't _believe_ the runs we've gotten this shift!" Johnny said. "The WHOLE shift!"

"He probably wouldn't," Roy said.

"I'll just take your word for it." Vince pulled his pen out of his shirt pocket and poised it over a pad of paper. "I just want to make a report on the incident."

"It all started yesterday morning," Johnny started.

Vince was confused. "Everything? Everything that has to do with _this_ particular incident started _yesterday_ morning?"

"That's right. See, yesterday morning, we got up, reported for shift, and we have stormy weather, right? The first call we get is for a woman trapped in a bubble. Do you believe it? A woman that's trapped in a BUBBLE! That's exactly what the dispatcher said. So we roll out and it turns out that the lady was _wrapped_ in some _bubble wrap_. [*_2_] She was almost suffocating, but we got there in time and cut the stuff off. Who knows how she got tangled up in that! The girl who called it in talked really really fast and apparently her mouth moved faster than her brain, because she never thought to get the victim out herself! And then, when we rolled out? There was this rainbow, and then later there wasn't a cloud in the sky!"

"Uh-huh." Vince tried catching DeSoto's eye, but the senior medic was watching his partner tell the story. Actually, he was more watching his partner's hand and making sure that Gage didn't do something to hurt it while he used unnecessary hand motions as he told the tale.

"Okay," Johnny continued, "Then our _next_ call involved a man who called saying he couldn't breathe."

"Uh-" Vince cut in quickly, "Is this gonna take long?"

"No, not at all. Anyways, we roll in, and the man's laying on the floor of his attic, gasping for breath, with a box of old Halloween decorations upturned on the floor. He's hyperventilating, so the solution is simple. We get out a paper bag, right? Well..."

"It's dark, and he knows we're there, but the man lost his glasses, so he can't see a thing," Roy started in.

"And you know paper bags make a lot of noise?" Johnny said more than asked. Vince nodded.

"Well," Roy said, "I opened the bag, but when he heard the noise, he was convinced that it was mice, so he got up and started jumping up and down and yelling, 'Mice! Mice! Mice!'. All the racket woke up some slumbering Chiroptera and they started flying around us and him and then of course his cries went from 'Mice!' to 'Bats!'. By then, we figured we wouldn't be able to do much help for him if we stayed in the attic so me and Johnny calmly escorted him downstairs where we sat him in a chair and got him to use the paper bag to breathe into. The downstairs was brighter and since he could now see what we were doing, he calmed down pretty quickly after that."

"After I assured him that none of the bats escaped the attic since I closed the door behind me," Johnny added.

"When we asked him what happened in the first place," Roy continued on, "he told us that he was looking for something up there when a box of old Halloween decorations that his kids stored that he didn't know about fell on top of him. An old fake spider landed on the back of his hand and he was convinced that it was real, poisonous, and had bitten him. He dropped his flashlight making the light go out and ran down the stairs to call for help."

"But by that time he was beginning to hyperventilate and simply told the dispatcher that he was having trouble breathing," Johnny said.

"Then he found that when the box had fallen over his head, it had knocked his glasses off-"

"-So of course he went back upstairs to look."

"Then we arrived," Roy concluded.

"A fascinating tale, boys, but-"

"Oh, that's not the best part," Johnny cut in.

"Oh?"

"Nope," Roy shook his head, grinning. "After that, we learned his name."

"Really."

"His name was Lionel D. Crowlee, but everyone calls him Larry," DeSoto informed.

"Okay..." Vince reached up and scratched his neck, not comprehending.

"Lionel. Lionel D. Crowlee. Try saying that backwards," Johnny urged. "Go ahead, try it."

With a sigh, Vince slowly did. "Ee-lwork eed Len-oh-ee-ill... eye-ill? Ee-ill. So what?"

"Vince!"

"Crowlee D. Lionel." He really didn't have time for this, and it showed in his voice. Unfortunately for him, the medics didn't seem to catch the hint. Either that, or they were ignoring it.

"Doesn't it sound kinda like the... ya know, the... cowardly lion?" Johnny asked.

"Not really, no."

"Think about it."

Vince's eyes rolled upward as he wasted three point five more seconds of his working time to pretend to think. "Okay, I thought about it," he lied.

"And?"

"And what?"

"Maybe this'll help-" Johnny started, but stopped when Chet Kelly walked up to the group.

"Would you believe me if I told you there was a yellow brick road winding around the backyard flower garden?"

"After the other calls we've gotten this shift?" Johnny replied. "Yes I would. I really would, Chet, even coming from you. Do they?"

"No, I was just wondering if you'd believe me."

"Ha-ha."

"Gentlemen, these stories have been very interesting. I mean it. Maybe we could continue them over lunch sometime. But in the meantime, about my repor-"

"You guys were telling him?" Chet asked. "Without me? I make up half the story!"

"That's exactly why we're _not_ letting _you_ tell the whole story, Chester B.!"

"That's not what I meant, Gage, and you know it!"

"Oh, hush up; I wasn't even to the good part yet."

"Yeah, but come on, Gage – face it. Knowing you, we all have good reason to believe that you'll _never_ get to the good part of _any_ story, let alone this one!" Marco teased as he came up behind Chet.

"True, but it's not even so much a story as it is a recounting of various calls we've recently rolled out on that are seemingly connected. There is no introduction, inciting action, rising action, climax, falling action, or resolution. To summarize, there is no actual plot to the story. It is a mere recounting – but funny, nonetheless."

"Thank you... Mike. Kind of. I think. Not quite sure, really," Johnny said in mild confusion.

Mike smiled and disappeared around the engine again.

"And this last one wouldn't have been so funny if YOU were the one to get mauled on the hand by that... ankle-biter that they dare call a dog!" Johnny shouted loud enough for the engineer to hear.

"Yeah, about that-" Vince started.

"Dogs are supposed to be descendants from wolves, right? If the thing can barely get up the front porch steps or is being carried around in a purse, personally, I don't think 'dog' – I think 'pipsqueak'."

"So how far have you gotten?" Chet asked.

"We've told him about Glinda and Larry," Roy replied quickly before his partner could rant another round about the degraded evolution of the canine kind.

"Really? How long has this guy been here? Four, five minutes?" Chet gestured towards Vince. "And you've only chipped the tip of the proverbial iceburg? The man doesn't wanna stand here all day while you recite to him your bibliographies. Come on, guys – speed it up a bit, would ya?"

"Please," Vince urged. If he couldn't get them to just skip it all and come to the part he needed to get his report on, he'd at least encourage the idea that they might hurry through their lengthy tale."

"Okay. So the guys come back, it's lunch time, and they tell us what was happening," Chet said. "That's when dispatch calls us out for a woman unconscious. Pretty routine, right?"

"Kelly, if any of these calls were routine, you guys wouldn't be telling me all this and I might have this report done by now," Vince stated with a hint of irritation.

"Hey, don't blame me – it's the medics who were droning on over every minute detail. So anyways, we get to this nursery, ya know, the kind for plants? And we had to force our way in. Oh, hey Cap. So once we get in there, guess what we find?"

Vince didn't guess, but his silent strategy didn't deter. Chet continued, "This girl is laying unconscious in this bed of flowers. And d'ya know what kind of flowers they were? Do ya, huh?"

"I dunno, but I think you ask more questions than Gage and DeSoto," Vince replied. Captain Stanley chuckled at the comment. He had walked up and stood next to the policeman as his men told the story. The grill fire was out and cleaned up awhile ago. The press was gone, and the owners weren't home yet, so he would wait a few minutes before putting them back into service.

"Poppies! She had fallen unconscious in a bed of poppies! Can you believe that?" Chet asked.

"The only thing that would've made it more incredible was if there had been snow," Marco stated.

"That would've been an incredible snow job, since we don't even get frost here in good 'ol LA County," Captain Stanley threw in.

"Yeah, well..." Johnny shrugged. "The point is-"

"So there IS a point to all this?" Vince asked.

"Oh, yeah, of course, Vince. We wouldn't be taking your time here if there wasn't, would we?" Johnny answered.

"I'm beginning to wonder..."

"Well, it turned out the woman was alright," DeSoto said.

"Let me guess – did she prick her finger and fall into a deep sleep?" Vince asked sarcastically before he could stop himself. Great. Now he was encouraging them to make their explanations longer, which would in turn make the story itself longer. Great going, Lieutenant.

"No, actually, she just fainted. I don't remember what from, but it wasn't life-threatening or anything really serious," Roy answered. "I could look at the call slip if-"

"DeSoto, you didn't log yesterday's runs yet?" Cap interrupted.

"Nope, it got too late last night. Then we had this call before morning tones. We'll get it when we get back."

"Yeah, 'cause I don't think we're in Station 51 anymore, are we?" Mike couldn't help asking.

"Nope."

"After that call with Dorothy," Chet started.

"You NAMED the victims?" Cap cut in with a tone of incredulity.

"Hey, Mike started it by calling the girl in the bubble wrap Glinda," Johnny explained.

Mike tried to look innocent while Cap narrowed his eyes at him.

"After D- ah, the woman in the poppies," Marco continued the story, "there was a call to this apple orchard. A kid stuck in a tree."

Vince had long since given up even thinking of the idea that he might get his report in by the end of the hour.

"We get there and there's this birthday party going on. Turns out the birthday boy wanted a good view of the ground activities, so he climbed the biggest tree he could find and got stuck in it. He was fine, just scared. Chet climbed up to his level and found him all right."

"It was easy getting him out. All he had was a few minor scrapes from the branches, but other than that, he was fine," Chet said. "His name was Tim. Tim Manny."

"There you guys go with the names again," Vince muttered.

"Ah, come on, Vince – you can**not** say that the name Tim Manny doesn't sound the least bit like Tin Man!" Johnny said. "And he was stuck – in an apple orchard. The birthday hat that he was wearing was even made out of aluminum foil." [*_3_]

"Cheap hat."

"But the point is that it was silver!"

"But not tin."

"You're impossible to convince!"

"Convince me of what?"

"Absolutely impossible. Why are we even telling you this?"

"Yes, John, why **are** you telling me all this?"

"Okay fine. But you cannot say that our _next_ call wasn't connected."

"Connected to _WHAT_?"

"After dinner we were called out to a corn maze," Captain Stanley said. "A bonfire got a little out of control, and so they called the fire department."

"It was a costume party," Mike informed.

"Yeah, and there was one burn victim. It wasn't too bad, there were only first degree burns on his hands. But do you have an idea as to what he was dressed as?" Roy asked.

"I haven't the faintest."

"Come on, Vince – guess! What was he dressed as?" Johnny urged.

Vince sighed. His voice dripping with sarcasm, he replied, "The Big Bad Wolf."

"No, Vince! He was dressed as a scarecrow! And he was burned. In a hay maze. By fire!"

"Ya don't say."

"Then this morning-"

"Are we coming to an end anytime soon?"

"Yeah, yeah. Anyways, this morning the couple who lives over there," Johnny pointed to the next house over, "called dispatch saying that their neighbor's grill was on fire."

"Did the owners leave it on?" Vince asked. Now that they were up to today, maybe he could finally start getting the information he needed.

"No; the neighbors were throwing a party in this backyard without the owner's permission and THEY left the grill on. Then they scurried back home and called dispatch from there so as not to get in trouble," Chet answered.

"How do you know?"

"Their party guests are snitches."

"Oh."

"And to be honest, we thought that this run had broken the chain of odd runs, when we looked at the neighboring street name," Roy said.

"Rainbow Blvd.," Gage, DeSoto, Kelly, and Lopez all said simultaneously.

"So?"

"_So_?" Johnny and Chet parroted.

"Right after we turned off the grill, Johnny got bit by the partying neighbor's dog," Mike said.

_'Finally,'_ Vince thought with relief.

"It was running around the yard unsupervised – it wasn't tied up or on a leash, it wasn't fenced in, and no-one was watching it," Stoker explained. "When the engine came around, the dog kept bothering us, but when we tried to catch it and move it out of the way, he'd run off. Then a few minutes later, he'd be back under foot again."

"Cap sent me to go the house and ask it's owners to come and take him away," Johnny said.

"But when the dog saw Gage marching onto _his_ property, it went after him, barking and snarling," Chet said. "Really, only the shine of its' toothpick-thick teeth made the black little midget look the least bit menacing. Then it leapt up and hung onto John's hand with it's teeth. He had to pry and shake it off."

"That had to smart," Vince commented as he wrote on his pad.

Johnny nodded, "Its' bite was definitely worse than its' bark."

"What kind of dog was it?"

"It was a Cairn Terrier," Mike stated.

"Oh, really? I would've just described him as a 'little black dog'," Kelly commented. [*_4_]

"We found his owner's, but they couldn't control him. He was running around biting other people, too, by that time, so we called Animal Control to take care of him. He had a collar and tags, and we just happened to catch its' name."

"What was it?"

"O-dot," Roy replied.

"What kind of person would name their dog 'O-dot'?" Marco wondered.

"But you know what that means?" Johnny asked. Without waiting for an answer (for once), he said, "The name 'O-dot' is 'Todo' spelled backwards. I mean, it is when you exclude the dash between the 'O' and the 'dot'."

"And that's significant because?" Vince asked.

"What, seriously? Nada? It doesn't ring _any_ bells? At all?" Marco asked.

Vince shook his head. "Nope; still don't get it."

"You don't... How can you not... It's _The Wizard of Oz_, man!" Gage said, exasperated with the Officer's lack of comprehension.

There was a pause – a blissful moment of silence – until Vince broke it by shaking his head again and saying, "Never read it."

"You've never read..." Chet repeated. "You've **never read 'the **_**Wizard of Oz**_'?" he asked with disbelief. "Not even seen the movie? Dude, it's a classic!" [*_5_]

"What about '_The Chronicles of Narnia_' by C.S. Lewis?" Mike asked. [*_6_] Vince once again shook his head 'no'. "What kind of homeschooler were you to _not_ have read '_The Chronicles of Narnia_'? They're classic literature!"

"Do you know what a Pegasus is?" Johnny threw out there.

"A Pega-what?"

"No Greek mythology either?" Roy asked.

"Nope."

"How about Homer?" Cap wondered.

"Who?"

"Homer – the guy who wrote '_The Odyssey_'." [*_7_]

"Never heard of him."

"Not even '_The Hobbit_'? [*_8/1_] Or '_The Lord of the Rings_'?" [*_8/2_] Marco asked.

"Who wrote 'em?"

"J.R.R. Tolkien."

"Nuh-uh."

"Wow, man, you really missed out," Marco said.

"Next time, let's make sure that our audience is properly informed on the literary jokes before we spend a whole half of half an hour making 'em, all right?" Cap suggested.

"I'm just not much of a book guy, that's all."

"Really? I thought you'd have to be to be a policeman. Don't you regularly have to '_book_' suspects?" Johnny snickered.

"And speaking of my job," Vince said a little louder than probably necessary, "I _really_ need to finish my report here. Is there anything else you can tell me about the... _today's_ incident? You know, the one involving the dog?"

"Why d'ya need to make a report?" Cap asked.

"Aren't you filing a complaint about the animal attack?" Vince addressed Gage.

Johnny frowned. "What? Of course not! I'm doing no such thing! The girl across the street who was playing next door and at some point also got bit by the dog, her parents are the ones filing the complaint."

Well, that cleared things up a bit. Vince hadn't thought that Gage was the type to do that sort of thing. "Great – so where's the girl?"

"Oh, her parents already left to take her to the hospital."

Vince thwacked his paper pad shut and just stood there for a moment. Finally, he asked them in irritation, "So you mean to tell me that I've been standing here for the past fifteen minutes for absolutely no reason at all?"

"Not for no reason, Vince," Johnny answered. "You got a chance to hear all about our day! Now how often does that get to happen?"

Vince opened his mouth to retort but nothing came out.

"If there's something you wanna say, now's your chance," Kelly pointed out.

Vince didn't answer but instead shut his mouth, walked away from the group, and got back in his vehicle to head over to the hospital to talk to the _right_ people. He was also thinking that maybe all his coworkers back at the barn probably weren't crazy after all. Maybe they were having weird runs, too, where Vince missed the punch lines and just didn't get it because he hadn't read many books as a kid – or even as an adult, for that matter. Yeah, that actually might explain a few things. Still, even with this tidbit of realization, Vince couldn't help but think that now that he knew, his day might just have gotten a little bit longer. It was certainly gonna be a 'one of those days' days, and that he knew for certain. As he backed up, pulled forward, then gained speed on the street, he wondered if maybe, in some cases, ignorance truly was bliss.

"All right fellas," Cap rubbed his hands together and ordered, "Let's load up and head back."

"Ya know," he said after he climbed into his seat on the engine and made the station available, "I'm half expecting us to be returning to an emerald station."

"As soon as we pull into the garage, Big Red is going to turn into Big Jade," Lopez said.

"And the squad's gonna be nicknamed 'The Leprechaun'," Chet added.

"I can hear Sam Lanier over the speakers now," Cap said. "'Emerald Station 51 – Munchkin from the Lullaby Guild not waking up'."

"Or, 'Emerald squad 51 – Munchkin from the Lollipop Guild having stomach pains'," Chet laughed.

"How about, 'Emerald Station 51 – Woman melting due to exposure to H20'," Marco threw in.

Mike thought a moment before contributing. "'Emerald Station 51 – woman pinned under a house. See the good witch in the bubble. Somewhere over the rainbow. Cross streets, the red and yellow brick roads. Time out: after the twister. Munchkins responding'."

The guys laughed at that.

"And our uniform shirts will have turned light green,"Kelly said.

"And our jackets will be navy green," Marco came back with.

"And we'll have to drink mint green tea instead of coffee," Cap said.

"And eat green eggs and ham," [*_9_] Chet said.

"But wait, wait," Marco cut in. "If we all had to wear and live in the color green, than how would we distinguish ourselves from the economists?"

"Simple; we trade in Big Jade for a horse drawn carriage and get ourselves a horse of many colors. Then _everyone_ would know who we were," Cap explained.

"You'd have to go through me first before trading her in," Stoker said as he pulled his girl onto the main drag. "Even if I do hate the color green."

When they arrived back at the station and both vehicles were parked, Johnny jumped out of the squad and proudly declared, "I know what it is!"

Everyone stopped and stared. Seeing that he had everybody's attention, he continued.

"It's May 17th! That was the day that "_The Wonderful Wizard of Oz_" was first published in 1900! Today is its' 75th anniversary."

"Wow. You'd think maybe they'd've waited for the hundredth," Mike commented as he hopped out of the engine and shut the door.

"Well who knows," Captain Stanley said as he led the way to the day room, "maybe the big firefighter in the sky likes to read to pass the time."

"And he's warning us," Chet added.

"What'd'ya mean by that?" DeSoto asked as they all pulled out chairs and sat at the table.

"Think of the Phantom – all year round he pulls little pranks around the station. But when Halloween rolls around, he _really_ gives people a hard time."

"And enjoys it," Johnny stated.

"Just wait 'till Oz's hundredth anniversary. Then you'll see."

"All right." Mike, who had just sat down, scooted back and got up again.

"Where ya going?" Cap asked curiously.

"To the office."

"Why?"

"Because I need to see if I'm on shift twenty-five years from now so that I can plan my vacation ahead of time."

"What're you talking about? You'll be battalion chief by then! Stoker!"

Before he could say anymore, the tones started playing their song.

"**Station 51 – Unknown type rescue at the zoo...**"

"Oh my, a UTR," Lopez said as they all jumped up and raced to the apparatus bay. Mike altered his route and went to the engine instead of the office. As he climbed up into the driver's seat, sat down and buttoned up his turnout coat, he asked aloud, "What are the odds that this one involves lions and tigers and bears?"

"Shut up and drive."

_**Fin**_

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_*1: "_Life_" cereal was popularized in the 1970's. The ad campaign ran from 1974 to 1986._

_*2: Bubble wrap was invented in 1957 by engineers Alfred Fielding and Marc Chavannes._

_*3: Tin/Aluminum foil was marketed commercially from the late 19th into the early 20th century._

_*4: In "_The Wonderful Wizard of Oz_" [book] L. Frank Baum [author] did not specifically state Toto's breed, but describes him as "a little black dog..." ...From the illustrations in the first book many have concluded that he is a Cairn Terrier... ._

_*5: "_The Wonderful Wizard of Oz_" is a children's novel written by L. Frank Baum and illustrated by W.W. Denslow. It was originally published on May 17th, 1900. The film version starring Judy Garland was released in 1939._

_*6: "_The Chronicles of Narnia_" is a series of seven high fantasy novels that were written by C.S. Lewis between 1949 and 1954 and illustrated by Pauline Baynes. The books were originally published in London between October 1950 and March 1956. They have been adapted several times, complete or in part, for radio, television, the stage, and film. The series is considered the author's best-known work, having sold over 100 million copies in 47 languages. Now who here wishes they were THAT good? *raises hand*_

_*7: "_The Odyssey_", is one of two major ancient Greek epic poems attributed to Homer. It is, in part, sequel to the "_Iliad_", the other work ascribed to Homer. The poem is fundamental to the modern Western canon, and is the second – the "_Iliad_" being the first – extant work of Western literature. It is believed to have been composed near the end of the 8th century BC, somewhere in Ionia, the Greek coastal region of Anatolia._

_*8/1: "_The Hobbit_" or "_There and Back Again_" is a fantasy novel and children's book by J.R.R. Tolkien. It was originally published in London on September 21st, 1937 to wide critical acclaim, being nominated for the Carnegie Medal and awarded a prize from the "_New York Herald Tribune_" for best juvenile fiction. The book remains popular and is recognized as a classic in children's literature._

_*8/2: "_The Lord of the Rings_" is a sequel of sorts to_ "The Hobbit_". It is a__ trilogy of epic high fantasy novels written by English philologist and University of Oxford professor J.R.R. Tolkien, and was written in stages between 1937 and 1949, much of it during WWII. It has ultimately become the third best-selling novel written, with over 150-million copies sold. Only "_A Tale of Two Cities_" by Charles Dickens and "_The Little Prince_" by Antoine de Saint-Exupery have sold more copies woldwide (over 200 million each) while the fourth best-selling novel is Tolkien's "_The Hobbit_"._

_*9: "_Green Eggs and Ham_" is a best-selling and critically acclaimed book by Dr. Seuss (a pen-name of Theodor Seuss Geisel), first published on August 12, 1960. As of 2001, according to "_Publishers Weekly_", it was the fourth-best-selling English-language children's book (novel) of all_ time.

_Info gleaned from the web._


End file.
